Who do you need to be in this moment?
Hello from beautiful Situ Gunung!
Each year, our high school students select a trip as part of a study abroad experience. We have over 1,200 students currently spread around the world! I did a trip just like this when I was a senior here at Singapore American School. Mine was a little less green and a whole lot colder as I navigated the cities of Vienna and Budapest with my friends and classmates.
Earlier this week I got pulled off the bench as a substitute chaperone for this adventure camping trip in Indonesia.
As I packed up, applied for a visa, and started to look at the itinerary, I began thinking about the group of kids I would be with, my cosponsor, and the other staff at the site I’d be working with and asked myself this question:
Who do you need to be in this moment?
Yes, you are you. You’re one person. But I bet if I tagged along with you for a few weeks, I would see that you’re really composed of many different versions of you.
I’m the same way.
I’ve got this guy—the performer, presenter, teacher. He loves being on stage and enjoys leading discussions.
For many years, there was this guy who carried the overconfidence necessary to compete in a culture filled with some big egos and lots of intensity.
Then there’s this guy—he avoids parties (leaves them early if he has to go), would prefer a night in watching a movie and eating pizza with family rather than being out. This is the version I tend to lean into most.
These are just a few of the personalities floating around.
Think about your own life for a moment. Who are you in different moments and situations? Which version of you is drawn out or tries to hide? We need these versions to help us navigate the endless variety of situations we’re put in.
They trick is to know who to access in different situations and to not just let the default version always take the lead.
Right now, I can’t let the version of me who wants to be an introvert be in charge. I need to be the connector, high energy version of myself because that’s what the group needs. This requires me to sometimes fight against some of my natural tendencies in these types of social situations. That’s a good thing—it’s good to have to practice moving in and out of these various versions.
There are even times where we need to try and access parts of ourselves that might seem like they rarely get to make appearances—like the time our family almost got stuck in LAX airport because our Covid test results weren’t in the exact format the airline wanted and I just didn’t leave the counter.
So, as you finish reading this and get ready for whatever you have next, ask yourself, “who do you need to be in this moment?”
Keep Asking,
Kyle
Want to see a video version of this? Check it out below: